Kurt Suck-Bain

Being that I'm going to be gone all day at a beach thing, I wrote this entry the night before, posting it as I ran out the door. I've always wanted to express why I hate grunge music so much, so as to give my seething dislikes an air of legitimacy. And where else to start but Kurt Cobain's band, Nirvana? Sorry Princess, but unless you can offer me a lapdance while cooking me the most delicious steak in the world, I'm not exercising clemency. :]

Music from Seattle during the late 80's, early 90's falls under one category: grunge, a form of alt-rock that emphasizes apathetic lyrics, distorted guitar sound, and a distinct image of "I don't give a fuck what I look like." Most grunge artists only care about playing music, and that's admirable. The obnoxious glitz and glam of hair metal was cacophonous enough, but watching a series of androgynous men prance about while they squeal about love and happiness is akin to stuffing a pickaxe into your eyes and then pouring acid into your ears. But yeah, the cool thing about grunge musicians was that they didn't give a fuck, and it was different. Not to mention depressing.

And therein lies my problem with grunge music in general. I'm a fag when it comes to music, I judge more than just the euphoniousness of the sound, I judge originality of the lyrics as well as the energy and creativity of the song. In that sense then, Nirvana, and other bands like Seether and Creed lack energy and have the same apathetic lyrics (For god's sake, the classic anthem of grunge, "Smells Like Teen Spirit" repeats the word "Hello" like a billion fucking times). Of course, don't think I only hate grunge songs that do this. I'm highly critical of AC/DC and Dragonforce for being repetitive and unoriginal, though that's not to say all of their music is garbage. I guess what I'm saying is a lot of "stereotypical" grunge, so to speak, is abhorrent.

But reading my argument, I see that it's more like I don't like music that doesn't satisfy those three criteria. But I also realize I'm a hypocrite, because I have a soft spot for corny 80's love rock like this:



And a warm place in my cold heart for a song like this:



Seriously, though, Foreigner is fucking PUSHING IT. Next I'll be saying I like Duran Duran, harharhar. These songs have a ton of energy, but aren't creative in the least. So I suppose I enjoy songs with high intensity, something Creed, Nirvana, Seether, and Screaming Trees simply don't provide with their apathetic lyrics and guitars that sound desperately in need of some Zoloft.

PS. I absolutely love Pearl Jam, Alice in Chains, Soundgarden, and Stone Temple Pilots though. Their songs are actually varied though, with a wide range of topics encompassing child molestation, kids committing suicide, slavery, and Vasoline (anyone who knows what the fuck this song is about wins a prize, seriously, I can't make any goddamn sense of it).